Dante

Dante was a beautiful 100-pound rescued German Shepherd that we got when he was about 4 or 5 years old. He enriched or lives for almost 8 years. He saved my life from an intruder, he walked beside me and let me put my hand on his big head when I was feeling unsteady on my feet, and he was always there to heal every hurt and kiss away every tear. He was always the dog that we joked about who never did anything wrong. Once, we had an accident where my husband was hurt at home and we had to rush him to the emergency room. We got home hours later to find that Dante hadn't even touched the steak diners we had left on our very short table which was eye level with him. He was so concerned for us, he didn't even look at the steaks but stayed at the window watching for us to come home. He never had any accidents in the house until a few months before he died. He never chewed anything up, never barked except when needed, was a gentle giant with everyone, and always seemed grate ful for every bit of love he was offered. He was our first dog and lived with us through five different homes, starting in the poorest location and finally moving to a nice neighborhood. He loved us when we had nothing. He came from a rough past. X-rays showed two gun pellets lodged in his body that had healed before we got him. The vet said they were not hurting him and not worth a surgery to remove them. They were always a reminder of his sad past. He also never learned to play. No matter how hard I tried, he would look at me like I had five heads if I threw something and asked him to go get it. But, he was a big baby Bear who would put his head in my lap and snuggle close to my heart.

He died due to cancer. A tumor we did not know about on his spleen ruptured. It grew in just three months, as he had a full check up and x-rays just a few months prior. He also had Degenerative Myelopathy, which was slowly causing him to be paralyzed in his back end. We were faced with the decision to let him go peacefully, or put him through a painful surgery where he may not survive. If he did make it, he would only to live a few more weeks before the cancer again caused something else to fail. He was always a dog that had so much dignity. I could not see him reduced to diapers, pills, and pain. I loved him too much to let him suffer so I could have a few more moments with him. We let him go peacefully. We held him until his last breath, whispering "I love you" over and over again so he would know how much he was loved. I have had many dogs over the years, but I have never felt as much pain as losing him.

Rest in peace, my Care Bear. We love you and will see you again someday. It just wouldn't be heaven without you there.

IF IT SHOULD BE

If it should be that I grow weak
And pain should keep me from my sleep,
Then you must do what must be done,
For this last battle cannot be won.

You will be sad, I understand.
Don't let your grief then stay your hand.
For this day, more than all the rest,
Your love for me must stand the test.

We've had so many happy years.
What is to come can hold no fears.
You'd not want me to suffer so;
The time has come -- please let me go.

Take me where my need they'll tend,
And please stay with me till the end.
Hold me firm and speak to me,
Until my eyes no longer see.

I know in time that you will see
The kindness that you did for me.
Although my tail its last has waved,
From pain and suffering I've been saved.

Please do not grieve -- it must be you
Who had this painful thing to do.
We've been so close, we two, these years;
Don't let your heart hold back its tears.

--- Anonymous ---

Sarah Hansen